Break The Cycle Of Overeating, Emotional Eating, And Binge Eating!
Breaking My Binge
Binge eating, dieting, emotional eating, dieting, overeating, dieting, feeling helpless, dieting … For over 30 years I used food to cope with my feelings, and I want to help you break the binge cycle!!
I was trapped in a binge eating and dieting cycle. I started binge eating at a very young age, sneaking food into my bedroom so no one else could see me. I’d make salads in mixing bowls after school, thinking I was making healthy choices, as I topped my lettuce with handfuls of cheese, lunch meat, croutons, and 1/2 cup of ranch dressing. At such a young age, I became lost in the world of using food to fulfill the feelings of loneliness, inadequacy, and hopelessness.
I walked into my first Weight Watchers meeting at the age of 10 and despite desperate attempts to help me lose weight through diet and exercise, I weighed over 200 pounds by age 13. I was happy on the outside, learning to use humor to hide my obesity, but inside I was sad, lonely, insecure, and angry. Angry that I was fat. Angry that I didn’t look like the other kids. Angry that I couldn’t diet and lose weight. My childhood was defined by a cycle of diets. I was either on or off a diet, binging to find comfort and to make up for the calories lost from the extremely restrictive diets I was following.
In high school I found my love and passion for athletics. I found sports that celebrated my size and quickly thrived! I won the state championship in power lifting, earned a full scholarship to throw the discus and hammer in college, and took pride in my ability to lift more than most men. I found an identity that brought true joy to my life, but behind closed doors I ate. I put away the scale, justifying my size with my sports, but when I graduated from college and walked away from the competitive world of sports, I lost my excuses for overeating and weighing 260 pounds.
For 12 years I fought for my health. I hopped on the newest diet fad as quickly as I could, battling to find my own way of losing weight in order to be successful. I found some success, losing 50+ pounds at one point, but I continued to binge eat, using food as my ultimate comforter and companion.
In 2009 my world came crashing down. I was sexually assaulted, kicked out of a church I had grown up in, and fell into a depression. One day changed everything, catapulting me back into binge eating as I desperately tried to find comfort each day.
As you can see through the archives of BalancingToday.com, I spent 8 years trying to break the binge cycle… though I didn’t always know binging was the deep rooted behavior that was keeping me from living a life of freedom, you’ll see the power binge eating had over my life. I joined Weight Watchers numerous times, tested out Scaleless Summers, visited nutritionists and dietitians, gave up coffee for 1 year, and tried my hardest to find resolution in a dietless life.
What I couldn’t get to the bottom of was, why wasn’t anyone talking about binge eating, emotional eating, and over eating? Why were we so focused on what to eat and how much to eat, but we weren’t focused on WHY we’re eating. I was so lost in the cycle of binge eating and dieting that I continued to slap band aids on the real problem. It didn’t matter what diet I was on. What mattered was getting to the root of WHY I was binge eating, overeating, and emotional eating! I had to understand WHY I was using food to cope!
In October 2017 I stumbled upon a book called Never Binge Again™. I purchased the book, which has over 1600 reviews on Amazon, and started reading it as soon as it arrived. By the end of the second chapter, I knew Dr. Livingston would change the way I think about food and would put me back in the drivers seat! It was such a different way of thinking and I knew it would change me forever… but it scared me! Something inside of me didn’t want to give up the foods I use to cope with life. Something inside of me didn’t want to stop overeating. Something inside of me didn’t want to walk away from 30+ years of habits.
I put the book away, but I thought about Never Binge Again™ constantly! In late December 2017 I purchased the book on Audible and listened to it 6 times! I replayed it over and over again, allowing Dr. Livingston’s words to soak in. Even then, something inside of me didn’t want to give up binge eating. What would I turn to if I didn’t binge eat? What would I do if I didn’t use food to cope with boredom? What would I do if others were eating the foods I loved and I wasn’t? What would I do if I found the success I had dreamed of for years? I had the answer, but that sabotaging voice inside of me wanted to keep me from breaking the binge!
On March 7, 2018, I decided once and for all to break the binge and to defeat my inner sabotage! I stopped ignoring my real issues and made the decision to put myself in the drivers seat. By acknowledging the areas in my life I turn to binge eating and developing my own food rules to fully quiet the inner voice, I have not only lost weight, but have found true freedom! I am no longer in a binge eating and dieting prison! I am no longer chained to the guilt, worry, depression, and self hate that comes with binge eating! I am a free person and I wear my pride, self confidence, and beauty on the outside and the inside!
I am a changed person, living a truly healthy life as I lose weight. As a Certified Never Binge Again Coach, I am determine to help YOU break the binge, to get into the drivers seat, to lose weight on your own terms, and to find TRUE FREEDOM! You can break this cycle! You can reach your goals! You can BREAK THE BINGE!